Channelling someone called Natalie.

Channelling someone called Natalie.

(A soft female voice whispers)

There are times when I look above, like a young stranger, still lost on a Miracle on 34th Street.

 And there are sad times when I look below everywhere I go. That I can still feel you like a rebel without a cause in everything I do.

Those small moments running wild within my lifes many visits. Into my old histories, trying to find a West Side Story.

 Hiding somewhere within the splendours of its tall green grass, where beautiful strangers sometimes seek sex with the single girls. Even those with no class.

Where you could fall deeply in love and be totally lost in those tranquil bouts of emotional insurrections.

At first, a silent revolution, and then a forced rebellion. But above on the surface, from here to eternity.

We hide ourselves from the watchers. Lying to ourselves. Parading such false love.

I loved you once, but below that surface where the darkness multiplies and grows, like in Chateau Marmont.

Where feelings of doubt, deep inner fears, and invisible tears always return.

I always pray they wouldn’t stay, but they always go on.

All questions heralding from the smiling, snarling, Paris Pitman Jr.

The Spartacus people loved.

The popular Mister Who Knows. Dressed in his white coat and with his foolish stare that I can still see him smiling everywhere.

I may seem calm and collected, but beneath the surface, I once feared being totally rejected by RJ and the watching world.

But for now, I still smile and play with Elvis. Empowered with the hope that those painful memories will fade, and these mysterious four winds will blow all those fears away.

It's how I now cope.

I will no longer visit my deep depths, where I was once drowned by maybe two accomplices off the coast of Santa Catalina.

In those dark blue waters. A place my soul still visits and where light

 lies in the distance.

For now, though, I’ll stay kneeling between these four candlelights, steadfast in the hope that justice will prevail.

Have you been afraid, as you age, of changing your statements and their misleading intent?

To extinguish your dark secrets, for it’s so tragic.

Have you built your life around yourself?

 Listened, hypnotized to believe your lies, now the public no longer cries?

Have some of your memories been happy, and some been magic?

But in a moment of heart-to-heart, does time and guilt give you the blues even as all our children get older?

The Great In-Between in waiting to judge you. Both.

 But you two have a good life while we all wait. Seek love like an untamed gypsy, embrace its golden rays as we now judge Major Garrett.

Now he’s entered a town without pity, somewhere in here. Up high in the Holy City.

Remember, in here. Tomorrow Is Forever.

This old movie never stops.

 It just goes on, catching all the Jekylls and Mr. Hydes.

Where we, all the victims of some sort of mortal crime, just wait in silence.

 In here.

Amongst the long shadows.

 Waiting to hand out justice to the corrupt.

 

Confess now before you stand before us.

 

It’s your only way to find salvation before your mortal or spiritual incarceration. 

(C)

Copyright John Duffy

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