. Poetry from The Great In-Between: The Jilted Grooms Monologue

Tuesday, August 24, 2021

The Jilted Grooms Monologue

 


(A lone voice whispers)

Is there nothing more wicked that you could do to me in front of everyone to see

As I sit here alone in this beautiful vicar's annexe room

But all said done
I'm still crying out for you and for some much-needed hope and sympathy

All I ever wanted was your blessings

Love and understanding so I could change

And find peace for all those sad times I went missing after work

I know you heard me crying

When you saw me in church last week before the wedding

Praying and kneeling

Trying to burn away all those old feelings and temptations which are still terrifying

I just wish you'd forgive me

For deep inside
All this old pain is constantly swirling and rising

And it's why I'm no longer smiling

For life without you as my fabulous wife feels like I'm slowly dying and being cut open by emotions sharp knife

Raw sensations which just keep twisting

Growing and shouting to be heard in this eerie silence

I know there can be no more hiding

No refuge from the irrefutable truth why you left

No more buying expensive sparkling diamond rings to turn off your warning bells and sirens

No more red wine and opening shining elegant gifts

No matter how perfect the timing

So I'll just keep trying to cope

Hoping in time I'll grow strong enough to keep fighting

Strong enough to find out who's waiting on the other side

Strong enough to stop drowning in tears

Strong enough to find hope and try to restart celebrating

And in time
God willing

Find me that piece of treasure that will instantly light up my sad life like you once did

Like a bolt of bright lightning

But until then
If you ever see me crying

Just know it's my price for trying to come into Gods house to exchange vows

Whilst carrying an invisible suitcase filled with stories of cheating and lying

Copyright John Duffy

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