I can't hold back my souvenirs of fears any longer
Though my tears still stain this grey uniform
I restfully wear
As I continuously look for a new sanctuary to rest
So my soul can repair
I've got to take all those heartfelt condemnations
With me
For with you
I've smiled, shouted and screamed in joy
To last for a thousand years
Constantly pushed to live the illuminated man's
Hidden underground dream
But what I wouldn't do now
Just to be with you
I know I must neglect all those painful memories
And try to go on and find the resilience I need
To let you go free
Just like a midnight lantern
Filled with good wishes and introduced into a New Year's Eve
Transformational sky
To fly so high
I know I need to step away and shut that badly worn door
And let my existence go on like Adam
Who once loved Lilith Prior to Eve
Before they went outside the Greatest of All Gardens
And all his first love for her
He silently always grieved
Would we be better off
If I had pulled all my barriers down
And let you in so totally
To climb in all my hidden tributaries, and swim
Maybe, but I reckon we'll never know
So I'll let go of my metaphysical claim on you
As you must do me
But you may call down someday in the near future unknown
In the falling rain or snow
For this painful love we once beautifully shared
Will keep us safe throughout the blinding of the heart
The silence in the mind
For this love we once experienced in the darkness
Beyond the light at midnight
Will go through a new phase of rediscovering
Rewriting our tragic love story
Like a modern-day Fyodor Dostoevsky
For humanity is sometimes incredibly
And intensely in love with all forms of suffering
And love in action is occasionally a brutal and tragic commodity
Whenever and forever described in relation to true love
As if in poetry or wishful dreams
For a love of any kind is never low key as it seems.........
Copyright John Duffy
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