. Poetry from The Great In-Between: The Desolation of Sara Deville

Tuesday, July 19, 2022

The Desolation of Sara Deville

Part 2 of the Good Father.


Press play before reading. Salute.



(A sad voice whispers)  

  


Two of the hardest things you'll ever face in your life  



Wherever it's your time to reside in here


The Great Other Side  

  



Is to find the courage to say Hello


To the one, you truly loved but broke


And then the profound strength to pay your respects


To then whisper  

Goodbye

  



And so it is with me after I died  

  



For whenever I pause in these quiet tranquil moments  

  



Sat in here  

All by myself  

  



By the moving rocks and lost in deep thoughts in this swirling grey smoke  

  



That would make any living person choke  

  



Now I'm a citizen of The Great In-Between  

  



I sometimes still think about all those long hot Summers nights  

  



So long ago  

  



When we all once walked by the churning Hawaiian blue sea with the children


When we were so much younger


Before sweet temptation called like a thief in the night  



You playing role of the good father


And me the loving mother and faithful lover  



As we all walked hand in hand like


Dorothy Gale  

The Scarecrow  

Tin Woodman, and the Cowardly Lion  

  

Through that wet weather and unforgettable thunder


Like we were totally unafraid to be seen


Like some of Zeus's immortals


I still get drenched with tears by the sweetest thoughts of you all and me


Walking by that bright yellow ice cream parlour by the raging blue sea  

  



Memories of a fierce love


Which must have shone like a lighthouse beacon for miles around and made such a glorious sound


Angels flying above watching


Must have felt a magical vibration


For it was a love many could only dream of  

  



For it seemed so damn gorgeous and profound  

  



The hot yellow city lights  

I sometimes remember still carry vivid memories  

  



Of an extraordinary time, where we all held each other's soft hands  

  



And everything seemed to be just alright in the early Eighties  

  



But like a pale white vulnerable feather  

  



Blowing carefree in the Four Winds  

  



Crazy blustery weather  

  



I then always remember  

What I did


For my Guardian Angel  

Argento


Showed me my life replayed


In Sacred Dream Theatre  



All those pivotal moments where I was happy or sad


In fact, all moments when I still lived with so much to give


I'm so sorry


How I foolishly surrendered to the whims


Of the Dark Gatherer of all Mortal Temptations  

  



And like an act from the Devil's favourite playbook  

  



Our intense love was viciously ripped from our carefully constructed cross of truth and true love  

  



By my machiavellian actions


Where I hid my secret side like a devious crook  

  



To slowly and tragically trick you all


And within each guilty passing second, it became easier


As I cast all those immoral rotten feelings into my invisible closet of the Forgotten  

  



And following in turn  

Lied to so many others  

  



Casually dismembering our once true love once found at 18


As I became more lost in the trap of Dissociation by Association


Now I sit alone in the dark trying to sing sad Adele songs


Knowing deep down there's no chance of Redemption  

  



Now I guess when I reflect  



Me and my secret lover were like two painful characters from a dystopian fantasy called Twelfth Night  

  



A terrible version of a classic Shakespearean Play  

  



No one cares or even wants to remember  

  



But I'll still treasure and carry our early beautiful memories everywhere I go as  



Even though I saw on the Sacred Dream Theatre


You read my black diary  



But now I'm free from the clutches of life and all its complicated and sometimes crazy games


Temptation demands the weak play  



I'll always treasure all footsteps walking in unison by the Hawaiian blue sea


As the rare passing Kiwikiu watched us


The children


You and me  



Memories of a fierce wild unrestricted love  

  



Which still shines so bright today like it once originally did before I died


Always return  

  



A bright glimmer I once saw in the Theatre


Which towered all above the hot yellow city lights  

  



Of a time we all once held soft hands  

  



And the future seemed so full of auspicious things


Which resonated with so much bright yellow sunlight  

  



Beloved memories of us all singing


We're off to see the wizard


Watching The Wonder Years


Eating popcorn by candlelight  

  



All the way to trying to keep warm throughout all those cold but soul-thrilling December winters nights


Roasting marshmallows and eating them by firelight  

  



A time when the world seemed so still perfect and filled with so much heartwarming delight  



And all the gossips about me by racketeers were carefully hidden out of sight  



I still miss you  

My beloved


My only true love who played the role of the good father as I cheated  

  



If only I could just hear your lovely soothing voice  

  



In this neverending twilight  

I wouldn't feel so defeated  

  



I'm sure it would help push back this ever-swirling darkness


And show me my own Yellow Brick Road to Saint Peter and Heavens welcoming bright white lights  

  



But I still hate myself for finding the courage to say


Hello to your twin brother


Luca


And now  

After all these years  

  



I've now finally found the strength to let you go and say Goodbye


I can't keep haunting you  

Sitting by our now cold martial bed


Watching you sleep since the children have grown and left


Leaving you all alone


I'll go now but will always remember you as I pray to be forgiven to ascend


You and my beloved children


Sara Lee and Stanley


Your one true love who the devil tempted and led her to his Met Gala of the Disloyal


Until her very end


But one day


I pray when you too wake in the Great In-Between


We'll start over and make up  

  



Yours forever


Your eternal soulmate whose once mortal name was plain old Sara Deville


From 445 Jacksonville


Try to forgive me, my Lawrence


For in my defence


The Devil stole my soul's only chance of salvation


When he smiled and took my hand to climb over Love's fences


To his dark lands of Desolation  



(C)


Copyright John Duffy


Image from Pinterest.  

Shared under fair usage policy.

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