Press play before reading. Salute.
(A lone voice whispers)
Is there nothing more wicked that you could do to me
In front of everyone to see
As I sit here after being alone in that beautiful vicar's annexe room
But all said done
I'm still crying out for you and for some much-needed hope and sympathy
All I ever wanted was some divine blessings
Love and understanding so you could change
And find peace for all those sad times you went missing after work
I know you heard me crying
When you saw me in church last week before the wedding
Praying and kneeling
Trying to burn away all those old feelings and temptations to confront you
Which are still so terrifying
I just wish you'd forgive me
For deep inside
All this old pain is constantly swirling and rising
And it's why I'm no longer smiling
For life without you as my fabulous wife
Feels like I'm slowly dying and being cut open by emotions sharp knife
Raw sensations which just keep twisting
Growing and shouting to be heard in this eerie silence
I know there can be no more hiding
No refuge from the irrefutable truth why you left
No more buying expensive sparkling diamond rings to turn off my warning bells and sirens
No more red wine and opening shining elegant gifts
No matter how perfect the timing is
So I'll just keep trying to cope
Hoping in time I'll grow strong enough to keep fighting
Strong enough to find out who was waiting on the other side
Strong enough to stop drowning in tears
Strong enough to find hope and try to restart celebrating
And in time
God willing
Find me that piece of treasure that will instantly light up my sad life like you once did
Like a bolt of bright lightning
But until then
If you ever see me crying
Just know it's my price for trying to come into Gods house to exchange vows
Whilst carrying an invisible suitcase
Filled with stories of your cheating and lying
(C)
Copyright John Duffy
Image shared from Pinterest. Fair usage policy applies.
(Before you enquire: of course it's made up :nerd:)
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