The Old Seer

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Salute.

When I was so much younger

I once met a stranger as I passed by a white picket fence

A delicate beautiful complicated femme fatale

Who waved and in time devoured my every breathing moments

Carefully taking down all those old erected barriers

With gentle soft fingers

I used to protect myself with

Whenever I felt threatened

And needed a strong defence

We laughed carefree like young lovers

Exchanging stories and tales of adulation

Eros would have been jealous of

In the middle of one wild night

We even created a safe white room where we

Could stay

Praying silently whenever we sat alone in our deep thoughts

Of each other to watching Angels

To stay forever entombed

In that very white room as the blushing bride and groom

A place where Father Time even seemed to stand still and watch for

We were so happy

But as time quickly passed as I got older

And my once strong body got frailer

Voices which have always followed me

Since I was willed into this maze we all walk

And dare call it a life

Whispered

Let her go

She needs new flesh and blood to make her warm

To feel love for the rest of her life

Don't be cruel and deny her

Something tangible to fill that deep void

You might leave when you die

Someone to take that suitcase of broken emotions and dreams

You once carried and upon new strong shoulders

Bare the heavy load

So I listened as I always do

Since they introduced me to her so long ago

Underneath her painted windows

By those unforgettable white picket fences

In these long days of the 21st Century, those voices seem to get louder as I get older

Whispers which have always guided and protected me

Now sung

She needs freedom to fly from this white room you've created

They whispered whenever I dreamed

She now uses a seemingly unbreakable chain of longing to stop herself leaving its penitentiary

They spoke

A lonely golden-haired orphan girl I loved

Who I once released back into the real world

For I couldn't be her own Westside Story's

Tony

For in time I knew I too would soon die

And she

Still standing alone

Would have to pick up that heavy suitcase again

So as I stand here where I always go

At ten past midnight in the deep recesses

Of my mind after a sip of mead

I just look up to the twinkling silvery stars across this great blue ocean

Between us and standing under that familiar old lamp post of forever treasured beautiful dreams

I can still see her beautiful smile

Dark seductive eyes and dressed in white lace

And hope she forgives me and knows this

I will always feel her deep love and always taste that thing

I know I will in quiet moments miss

When that date I must soon keep with my friend the Lord

And it's my time to die

That soft invisible kiss I once shared with my teacher

Lost in precious moments in the Heartbreak Hotel

As we played love-struck under the goddess of loves mesmerising spell

Its been a while since we last spoke

I knew she would hurt and painful emotions

Would pour out of every inch of her skin

Is this the price

I must now carry in trembling hands and tear-filled eyes

When before the Lord I kneel asking for forgiveness

When he asks me my worst mortal sins

Shall I tell him

Setting someone free to be all they can be

As they lay in someone else's arms

To give up love for someone to be happy

Until their time is also due

As I doom myself to wait by the holy river alone

I know in this new rebirth only the Lord can grant

We can be forever happy

For we are but soul twins

Now as I sit alone in these early morning lights

Typing and fighting these old broken emotions

Which always wash over me

I just hope she finds someone new soon

To hold her

As I was once told to believe

I was simply sent by God to help her see

And open her soul again

Is that the price of being a seer?

The cost of a broken heart

To see the real truth in all these sad minutes, days or years I have left, now we are forever emotionally and spiritually apart?

I hope somehow she understands and will always love me

Copyright John Duffy